Kehidupan Hidung Tersumbat

I'm An Idiot

2011-12-17T18:53:00.001+11:00

Neil Gaiman came to Melbourne a few years ago and I missed it because I was too busy procrastinating (tee-hee oxymoron makes me giggle).

He came again to Melbourne yesterday and I found out about it today.

I'm an idiot.

Lagu Raya

2011-11-21T20:13:00.001+11:00

Silly winamp. Shuffled to a lagu raya.

No, I am not sad at all. Where got. I am the picture of a stiff upper lip. Tak sedih pun.

Silly winamp.

Clipless

2011-08-11T08:18:00.003+10:00

This is the pedal for my bicycle. A clipless pedal.

You need a special shoe to ride using this pedal. This is how my special shoe looks like.

I'm special - Ralph Wiggum.

This is the sole of the shoe. The metal cleat clips into the pedal.

Neat.

An advantage of using a clipless pedal is it allows you to transfer more power and makes you go faster; instead of just pushing down on one side you will also be pulling up on the other side of the pedal. Making you less tyred. (That was lazy I have to admit)

A disadvantage of this system is you need to remember to clip in and out before you stop to avoid falling down. Once you get used to it, clipping in and out will be second nature.

Every cyclist has a story about falling down the first few times using a clipless system, but once you fall down you will always remember to clip out.

So far I have been really lucky as I have encountered no such problems. There were a few close calls but I have always managed to clip out just in time.

Until this morning.

I stopped at a busy intersection on the way to uni, clipped out with my left foot with my right foot clipped in.

Waiting on the sidewalk; just as the light turn green I suddenly lost my balance. I can see the ground coming up slowly to me on my right. I struggled to clip my right foot free clumsily, and the fall was less than graceful.

This happened at around 8am when the intersection was busy with traffic. I freed myself from the tangle on the ground and laughed out loud as I continued on riding to uni.

I didn't even have a scratch, the bike is fine, I fell on my shoulders and nothing is broken.

Except my pride.

Ayam

2011-07-28T17:47:00.001+10:00

Chickens swimming in the Yarra river

What diet plan?

2011-07-14T11:07:00.001+10:00

Next logical step: sambal tumis

This is also another cat

2011-07-10T12:30:00.001+10:00

Meow meow meow

Makcik Karipap

2011-06-29T12:26:00.001+10:00

I was at box hill for a medical consultation. Box hill is one of melbourne's many chinatowns.

It's full of people talking loudly on the phone. As I was walking through the market, I could not tell whether they were arguing, haggling or just exchanging pleasantries. I need to learn mandarin properly.

I managed to find a store selling curry puff. $2.20 for a curry puff not bigger than half my palm. I can't tell when was the last time I ate a curry puff.

It was meh.

Goodbye yellow brick toad

2011-06-11T21:03:00.001+10:00

So it came to this. I really enjoyed your company. Thank you for being there for me when times are rough.

I always knew it would eventually come to this. We would outgrew each other one day. Never thought it would be so soon.

Craptacular

2011-06-09T17:22:00.001+10:00

Just realised I made a mistake with my calculation. Whole week down the drain.

I should learn how to swear like a sailor.

Kari for life

2011-06-08T21:12:00.001+10:00

This bad boy is going into the fridge to stay overnight.

It's going to be ridiculously good, I don't care if I don't have a roof over my head tomorrow.

Riding without lights. Hit a pothole. Fly through air.

2011-06-08T19:16:00.001+10:00

Some bastards stole my bike lights.

Back before she had her lights, the workaround is to ride home before dark.

But that was in summer, twilight is 830pm.

Now it's winter, dusk is 430pm.

I am still in the office and it's 715pm.

Shit.

This is also a cat

2011-06-04T14:18:00.001+10:00

Meow meow

Broken heart

2011-05-30T17:35:00.001+10:00

The philosopher Anne Murray once said, "No I don't think time is going to heal this broken heart. No I don't see how it can if it's broken all apart."

This was on the side of the road. Everyday i took the same route. But now with this, i have to take a longer route to avoid this.

The wound is still warm and tender.

This is a cat

2011-05-29T17:50:00.001+10:00

Meow

Not even midwinter

2011-05-27T00:17:00.004+10:00

It is now getting ridiculously cold here. It's 4 degrees outside. My breath is foggy even inside my room.

It is raining almost every day and riding my bike is not the most ideal option but rather than take the bus, I would rather take my chances.

My brain has decided that it is better to heat up my core and major organs rather than distributing the blood to warm up my extremities. I have no toes.

The great philosophers, Jim Seals and Dash Crofts, once said "Summer breeze, makes me feel fine. Blowing through the jasmine in my mind."

Main Yarra Trail

2011-04-28T00:46:00.001+10:00

This is one of the reason why I would rather cycle over 20km in sub 10 degrees weather than pay Metro Train 4 dollars.

A picture taken of the Princes Bridge over the Yarra river. Pardon the quality from my camera phone. Lugging around a DSLR in a sweaty bag is less than ideal.

Rumah bujang

2011-04-22T14:27:00.001+10:00

That is a beef mushroom stew, on low heat for 6 hours.

Never mind the fact that it's cooking on the floor.

I made this

2011-04-14T20:05:00.001+10:00

After 4 months of phd work and this is the first thing that i made from scratch.

My precious...

It's a photodetector to be used for high speed laser locking.

When i tried to run it the first time, i put in 12 V which is twice from what it should be. Realised my mistake when the circuit became too warm. But it's still working after that initial bungle.

My precious...

New Laptop to Keep Me Company During the Cold Winter Months

2011-03-31T20:42:00.006+11:00

The great triumvirate of philosophers; Anita, June and Ruth Pointer once said, "I'm so excited and I just can't hide it."

My new laptop arrived in the mail today. I must remember to keep breathing. This is the most I have spent on a single item. I'm a poor student, don't even have a car. I have held a pair of leather shoes by Giorgio Armani worth AUD1200 though. Tried it on and compared it with another pair of leather shoes worth $100 and could not tell the difference. Maybe I am too much of a philistine but that is another story for another day.

The box from amazon:

The purchase came with a free sleeve. Kiasu to the max!

The new girlfriend

She weighs only 1.6kg at 13.3" with an i3, should theoretically give me enough power to do some fairly serious programming. Since I don't have a car *cough*, lugging a heavy laptop around on a bicycle is not the most appealing idea in the world. Discovered that the painful way with the laptop borrowed from my supervisor and a netbook just doesn't have enough grunt.

The next big decision is whether to wait for Ubuntu Natty Narwhal to come out or just go with Ubuntu Lucid Lynx. Decisions, decisions. She comes with Windows 7 pre-installed but Win7 can never hold a candle to Linux when you need to do serious work. Don't even get me started on a Mac. Just don't.

Our House

2011-02-27T20:38:00.010+11:00

The British philosopher Graham Nash once said,

"Our house is a very, very fine house. With two cats in the yard. Life used to be so hard. Now everything is easy. Because of you."

Pictorial tour of the place I'm living now.

This is what it looks like from the outside. When evening comes, a big bloody spider will weave a bloody big web right in front of the door. I'm trapped in the room until morning comes when the spider unweaves (is this even a word?) its web. If I were to come home late at night, I have to duck and hope to Anansi that it won't bite me.

Next to the room is a nice lawn. If anybody is up for it, playing cricket here is not too far a stretch. At night, it's a meeting place for horny cats. Hearing their orgy outside make you look back on your life and wonder where it all went wrong.

This is the main house. I only go in there to watch cricket and get my drinking water. It's a nice place to live.

I don't quite have a cupboard in my room. This is a converted fireplace where I try to hang my clothes. The mantelpiece makes for a nice bookshelf.

Next up is the place where real work is done (re: procrastination). On weekdays, this table will look more like a rat's nest. It looks more civilised on weekends. It also serves its function as a breakfast/lunch/dinner/gorging table.

The conveniently located fridge serves its purpose very well for binge eating late at night while watching a marathon of The Simpsons. Alone.

Yes. That is an oven. At times I will be too bloody lazy to go to the main house. I just work some magic with something from the fridge and put it in the oven. I like that oven. And this corner of the world is also dedicated to clothes and dirty laundry. The lines along these two are often blurred and arbitrary.

I didn't take a picture of the bathroom and the bed although you can catch glimpses of it. Yes, it is pink. I sleep on a pink bed. It makes my skin more radiant in the morning. I also bathe myself in a mixture of olive oil and goat's milk. On a full moon, I use Round-Up.

I ride on Sundays because I have no friends

2011-02-20T22:27:00.002+11:00

Passing through the tunnel makes you feel like Chihiro from Spirited Away. The sense of dread and uncertainty that looms.

Yes, I just compared myself to a little girl.

A Fat Guy and His Bicycle

2011-02-16T00:30:00.008+11:00

On Sunday, I realised that I had no friends around. That is where my life is right now and it's a slippery slope.

Bored shitless, I seek refuge in my bicycle. My sweet, sweet bicycle. I decided to ride to Chadstone, which is a fairly big shopping complex. Twilight tends to creep up on you at this time of the year, I need to get my rear and front lights for the bicycle. To make sure that no one would unwillingly (perhaps, willingly?) ram into my bike or the opposite, me running into people.

Sweeeeeeeet!

Chadstone is only about 2km from where I live. When about to reach Chadstone, which is on my right, I turned to my left and could see the skyline of the CBD in the distance, irking and galling at me to have a go.

At times, I have been known to not make good life decisions. Riding 20kms to the city without knowing the route now on the list.

There are dedicated bike trails and the scenery is quite amazing which makes the ride enjoyable and more tolerable.

Along the way, I came across this bridge which collapsed, I assume, during the floodstorm a few weeks ago.

There are more evidence of the recent floodstorm with silt and sediments from the river lining up along the path. The waters must have reached the level of the path which is a good 3-4 meters from the water level.

It took about one and a half hours to reach the city. Bought what I needed to buy and went to visit friends. I left the city at about 7pm, should have left earlier. Riding in the dark even with a powerful headlight is no fun if you don't know the way.

Lucky I had my trusty phone with me otherwise I would have ridden all the way to the Dandenong Ranges.

40kms in one day. Not bad for a fat and grossly unfit guy.

Friday Night

2011-02-11T21:28:00.001+11:00

It's friday night and I'm alone at home managing my podcast subscription.

Productivity is not important if you're a cat

2011-02-07T02:10:00.003+11:00

Having a double monitor does not increase productivity linearly. It decreases exponentially at best.

A Bum On His Way to Work

2011-01-31T21:30:00.005+11:00

I made the mistake of catching the rush hour morning train to summer school. Having been a student all my life, my experiences with rush hour public transportation are fairly limited. My house has always been within cycling distance/walking distance/I used to have a scooter/I can wake up anytime I want.

Unfortunately, summer school is not held at my uni. It's at another institution which requires me to either take the train or cycle for 2 hours to get there. I chose the former.

Making matters worse, although it's only early morning 8-ish, the mercury was at 37 degrees. It's times like these when I am grateful that my nose is not that functional. But today, it decides to work again. Of all days.

Anyway.

When I look around, all the men are wearing suits with a noose around their neck in blistering hot weather. I'm wearing a t-shirt that says 'Myanmar: Have You Been To Myanmar?' and a pair of jeans that has seen better days with slippers.

I look like a total bum and for that I am thankful.

p/s: The cartoon below from SMBC is not displaying properly. I am too lazy to make it right. Click on it. Ensue hilarity.

How a Cricket ODI Brought Out An Unsolved Emotional Childhood Issue

2011-01-17T20:12:00.005+11:00

Went to cricket one day international at the hallowed ground that is Melbourne Cricket Ground.

It was 40 years of one day cricket being played with the first match of Australia playing England, hence fittingly the theme of the day was 1970's cricket.

My best impression of a 1970's West Indies cricketer wearing a 1970's Australian ODI shirt. Although at best I looked more like a Tamil film star.

The match starts at 2pm. Although the weather was perfect for a day of cricket, little did I realise that as the day goes on the mercury will be in the high 20s and there would be very little cloud cover.

The heat was very intense that day and the Australian sun is always unforgiving. We forgot to bring sunblock that day. Which was a very bad mistake.

When my friend asked did I bring sunblock, I turned my nose and nonchalantly said that I am from a tropical country and am myself tanned enough. Famous last words.

My face is burnt. Wearing sunglasses on the day, there is a very clear line between burnt skin and not. The part of my arm which was not covered by the sleeve is turning purple and feels like needles.

Although it hurts, it makes me happy and warm inside. Ever since I was a kid, I was always taunted by my siblings and mother that I was adopted. (See how emotionally scarring my childhood was?)

My skin was darker than all of them. I always defended myself by saying that I was outside a lot and my skin gets burned easily. But then my evil sisters, nay, witches, would retort as to why my little brother who accompanied me a lot is still very fair. They would then go back to their cauldron and stir whatever it is that they are brewing whilst cackling among themselves. I would then tearily retreat back to my room.

My point being, my experience at the cricket taught me that my skin in fact burnt easily. Even my Chinese and Caucasian friend did not get burnt as bad as I did. So I was actually not adopted.

Or was I?

p/s: Why do I need to justify this after all these years? Could it be some deep childhood psychological trauma?

Disorder

2011-01-15T06:43:00.002+11:00

On weekdays when I'm supposed to wake up at 6am, I'll wake up at 11am.

But on weekends, when I have the privilege to sleep in until dusk, I'll wake up at 545am.

Spring cleaning it is.

Moving

2011-01-01T23:25:00.006+11:00

In the past month, I have had to move houses twice.

Before that, I was squatting.

I could make this sound more like the opening song of "Fresh Prince of Bel Air".

(90's sitcom reference FTW!)

Anyway...

The first house was in Oakleigh. A nice 2 bedroom flat very close to the train station and shops. The location is nice.

A typical rush hour scene in Oakleigh. Notice how all the cars are not moving. That is how bad the gridlock is.

But.

The housemate is a bit weird. Not a very affable fellow. Too fussy. He told me to take less shower and make my showers shorter. Told me to scrub the shower because I used it more often. He also tricked me when I was inspecting the place. He covered the laundry pipes with towel so that I would not know that the place has no washing machine.

Boo hoo rickety hoo.

And.

After about a month staying there, the time comes to sign the lease with the owner of the place. My housemate was advertising the place which is why I did not sign the agreement with the owner when I moved in.

I was to meet her on a Wednesday. She called my housemate to ask him what are my occupation.

He said " Wan is an international student doing his PhD."

She then said "International student? Oh no. I don't like international students. He has to move out."

Just like that I need to look for a new place again.

Apparently before us, two Hong Kong girls were staying there. They did not know how to take care of the place. The toilet is all moldy and has to be repainted. They did not open the windows to let the air in and the place stinks like the zoo after feeding time. I'm assuming they come from a rich family with plenty of maids that their kids did not know how to do any chores.

Slightly unrelated image.

I did not even get a chance to defend myself before I was put into the stereotype basket of international-students-does-not-know-how-to-take-care-of-a-house.

I come from a Weberian middle class family and from a young age my mother instilled in me the values of hygiene and sanitation. In other words, cleaning the toilet. I didn't like it at first but it comes in handy these days. I also like to play with my dad's toolbox and he would scold me if he finds out. Being an experimental physicist, learning how to use tools from an early age also came in handy but that is a story for another day.

The irony is the house owner is actually an immigrant too.

Howls of derisive laughter.

Oh well.

Cycle

2010-12-31T21:48:00.002+11:00

You said goodbye, I said hello.

The Beatles

Moving on with life.

What am I doing here again?

Feel free to punch this guy when you see him around

2010-12-16T18:03:00.005+11:00

Taken from here: http://www.physics.monash.edu.au/people/students/zakwan.html

Project Title: Atom Based Potentials For Bose-Einstein Condensates.

Summary: Bose-Einstein Condensates (BEC) of atomic gases offer many advantages in that they are well understood and perturbations can be controlled to a high degree. Lasers can be used to create potentials to manipulate and perturb BECs. Arbitrary light field patterns can be created using lasers. However there is a limit to the size of the patterns that can be created. The minimum size of the patterns is limited by the diffraction of light, which is on the order of the optical wavelength, around 0.5 micron. The goal of this project is to develop atomic based potentials to create atomic-scale perturbations to interact with a BEC.

Don't you just feel a rage and anger developing inside you when you look at the picture and feel like just punching the guy hard in the nose? I know I did. What a smug looking prick.

p/s: There is an axiom floating around: never ask a postgrad student about how his/her research is going. Just don't.

Sandwich

2010-12-01T12:46:00.002+11:00

This is a chicken avocado sandwich.

Look at the keyboard. Then look at the length of the sandwich.

Look at the keyboard again. Look at the size of the sandwich again.

This gargantuan comestible is the size of my arm. Never in my life have I taken 20 minutes to down a sandwich.

You have been a worthy adversary.

p/s: The morning I bought the sandwich, I was actually pining for nasi lemak. The size of the monster sandwich did little to satiate my yearning for a plate of rich coconutty goodness drowned with a ladle of hot sambal and everything I could get my hands on. If the nasi lemak does not spell 'cholesterol' in big capital letters I will not stop.

p/s2: Why am I here? Why am I not home eating nasi lemak?

p/s3: Get me my nasi lemak.

Kucing Gila

2010-11-25T16:28:00.002+11:00

The only half-sane cat left at Sri Gombak. The others have been made into McD's chicken burgers.

Expensive

2010-11-15T17:44:00.002+11:00

"Wan, do you know how much that thing is worth?" while pointing to the box that I'm unpacking.

"No."

"It's $20,000. More than you and me combined."

Playing around with expensive equipment makes you feel worthless.

Bloody iTunes

2010-11-04T18:13:00.002+11:00

Being a lazy sod, iTunes is given a free rein to scour my hard drive to search for mp3s.

Being a lazy sod, iTunes is set to shuffle.

Can't really blame iTunes when it plays Aishah - Setitis Cahaya di Aidilfitri.

Damn it iTunes. Now you make me want to go home.

Disclaimer: This post is not an endorsement for iTunes. It's too clunky for my liking. It's installed on the office computer and being a lazy sod, I am too lazy to install winamp.

The Muppets

2010-11-04T03:02:00.002+11:00

The Muppets version of Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover.

Not a bad cover at all.

A Bag of Tools

2010-11-03T00:31:00.001+11:00

Isn’t it strange how princes and kings,
and clowns that caper in sawdust rings,
and common people, like you and me,
are builders for eternity?

Each is given a list of rules;
a shapeless mass; a bag of tools.
And each must fashion, ere life is flown,
A stumbling block, or a Stepping-Stone.

R.L. Sharpe

Fat

2010-10-31T23:37:00.003+11:00

This is a piece of foie gras that has been sliced and ready to be slathered on a toasted rye bread.

Taken from: http://www.brissy.com.au/forum/snails-foi-gras-night-t171660.html

Foie gras is made from a liver of a duck or goose that has been specially fattened. Typically, a duck or goose is fattened by force feeding them.

Foie gras is very famous in France where it is considered to be a delicacy. The ducks are fattened by stuffing a tube full of corn down its throat, known as gavaging. The animals are force fed for about two weeks until they have reached the desired fattiness. Then off to the chopping block.

Note that there are producers who produces foie gras by natural feeding but that is an argument for another day.

What has all this got to do with me? Well if you must know.

I went back to KL for a little over a month. I went back wearing a size 32 and when I boarded the flight to Melbourne, I'm wearing a size 40 courtesy of my dad.

I ripped one of my favourite pair of pants when I tried it on the other day in KL. Unashamedly, I gained 10 kg in the space of 1 month.

While not one to lay blame and point fingers, instead of placing the blame squarely on my shoulders I prefer to let someone else be the black sheep.

I might go as far as to say that my weight gain was never my fault.

It was not my fault. I was force fed.

Where Was I?

2010-10-12T03:17:00.008+11:00

Now (title above),

For those of you who are keen to kill your productivity by visiting this address, I can assure you that you will not gain any insight into your life nor any life changing epiphany.

I have been away. I did notice that.

The past few months have been hectic. Apart from 1st of August until now that is.

In the words of Assoc. Prof. David Paganin, "Having to submit an assignment every microsecond." Which is not very far from the truth and certainly not an exaggeration.

Having to take 6 subjects covering everything about physics from the turn of the 20th century until the newest development which happened literally only a few weeks ago are absolutely ridiculous. No one should ever have to go through that in their lives. And a research project on top of the 6 subjects.

You lose friends along the way. You lose your appetite. You dread to see the sun rise as you are still solving 6 pages worth of equations. You lose your hair at an alarming rate. You lose any hope that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. Weekends are just another 48 hours to do more work, cry, try to slash your wrist but chickened out, get a big bag of oily and greasy fried chicken to drown your sorrows in and do more work. In that order.

This is one of the devices that I spent countless hours working on and most of the time it doesn't even work. For the record, the one above is a crappy one.

But at the end of the day, it is all worth it. I managed to hand in my thesis in time with very little change. My thesis is on "Molybdenum Disulphide on Silicon as a heterojunction photovoltaic cell." Beats me, I don't know what it means either.

After the dust has settled, I managed to weasel my way to a good result. Which is more than I had expected given the level of effort that I put in. The Myth of the Lazy Native would no longer be a myth.

How to end this incoherent ramblings on why I haven't updated for months? Taking a break for even a month is enough for my brain to atrophy and rot. Which I thing a good thinking I.

Maybe I'll show things that I have played with in the past few months.

That is a plasma ring at 150W. If you touch it, it would kill you. Or maybe it won't. You need to wear a special goggle or otherwise your retina might be burnt. Or maybe it might not.

Tungsten metal heated up to 900 degrees Celcius. The amount of power it consumed is enough to power a small island nation for a few weeks. Or maybe not.

Shiny box on the right is a Faraday cage. Made from cardboard box, aluminium foil, and chicken wire. Yes, you read that right. Chicken wire. They gave me an A for making that. Suckers.

Pastry Addiction

2010-04-26T18:06:00.005+10:00

The moment I wake up, before I put on my make up.

Wait, that's not right.

Let me start again.

Every morning, I would stumble my way to the campus centre in search of a danish.

Once the flaky, buttery, melts in your mouth pastry hits your tongue you feel like there's a party going on in your mouth. And everyone is invited. Makes you feel like dancing to Go West - King of Wishful Thinking.

I get over you, I know I will..

I'll pretend my ship's not sinking...

But once the sugar hit wears off, you feel sleepy again. You then sleep and wait for lunchtime. Which in my world is at anytime I feel hungry and my supervisor is nowhere in sight.

Wan..Wan..Wan..Wan...Wan

2010-04-15T01:04:00.002+10:00

My students in my lab class literally did this to me. Substitute 'Mom, Mommy, Lois, Ma' with 'Wan, Wan, Wan, Wan, Wan'...you get the idea.

Being a good demonstrator that I am, I gave those who participated in the atrocious crime 3 out of 8.

Why didn't I thought of this before to annoy my mother?

On-che u-pon

2010-04-05T10:07:00.003+10:00

"So Robbie, where are you from?"

"I'm actually from New Zealand."

"Ah a Kiwi."

"Yeah."

"But you don't sound very kiwi-ish(?) to me. I mean you don't have much of an accent."

"I've lived in Australia for very long, so I don't really have a kiwi accent. Where are you originally from Wan?"

"I'm from Malaysia."

"How long have you been here?"

"Let's see (thinking long and hard), I started my degree in 2006."

"Oh okay, I thought you were here for longer. Because your pronunciation is perfect. Your English is pretty good."

"Thank you. I don't really know what to say to that."

On hindsight, I should have told him that my mother is a grammar nazi.

----------------------------

I was 8 years old. We would all congregate in our parent's room after the dusk prayers.

I brought with me a Peter Rabbit book. I sat near my mom as she instructed me to read aloud.

"On-che u-pon a time..."

"(Laughter). Bukan on-che u-pon a time la. Sebut dia wans uh-pawn. (Laughter). On-che u-pon. (More laughter)."

---------------------------

At random times, she would still make fun of me.

That experience scarred me for life. The mental trauma associated with it are beyond words to describe. The thought of it still shudders me at night.

On-che u-pon.

Obi-Wan

2010-03-18T16:08:00.004+11:00

As I was demonstrating a first year lab yesterday, a student called me Obi-Wan.

SO COOL!

No one has ever called me Obi-Wan before. I then addressed him as My Young Padawan Learner.

He said, "Bye Obi-Wan." as he went out and I said "May the force be with you."

THAT IS SO COOL!

If he was a girl, I would have married him straight away.

So cool right?

Rabbits Are Very Smart

2010-03-15T21:47:00.002+11:00

"My lecturer once said, even rabbits can differentiate. But integral, that's another story."

A Russian lecturer in a thick Russian accent

Good Morning Sunshine

2010-03-05T10:05:00.003+11:00

Hello world.

Hello roses blooming in late summer.

Hello man rolling out garbo bin to the sidewalk. Those shorts do look mighty comfy.

Hello cat on the footpath. Come and brush on my leg, I won't mind. You're such a purr motor aren't you?

Hello lady walking her dog. I see you already have a plastic bag at hand to pick up after your golden retriever.

Hello clouds covering the morning sky. Is it going to rain today? When? I don't have an umbrella. Oh well, I could just wing it.

Hello Asian girl looking very grumpy. Do you have a test today and you haven't studied anything? Better luck next time and remember to smile.

Hello guy buying coffee. You might want to cut down on the caffeine, your dark circles are getting larger.

Hello dude doing 60kmh in a 20kmh zone with your side mirror just inches away from me.

Hello cursing and swearing lab technician. Did someone forgot to turn off the xray machine, it ran overnight and now it's overheating? It's a wonderful morning isn't it.

Hello supervisor uttering a few choice harsh words because my work is less than satisfactory. I'm sorry but I can't stop smiling.

Someone might throw a Molotov cocktail into my office and I don't think I could still wipe this obnoxious smirk off my face.

Hello world. It's a glorious morning today. What a good day to be alive.

Radiation Badge and the Medicine Show

2010-02-15T17:06:00.008+11:00

The powers that be have decided that I am deemed worthy/foolish enough to be granted access to radioactive materials.

Makes me giddy like a little school girl.

(Cue: The Pointer Sisters - I'm So Excited.)

Pointer Sisters - I'm so excited

I get to wear a badge and it makes me drunk with power whenever I clipped it on.

How does it feel to be drunk with power I hear you ask. Well for starters, it makes you feel like you're Darth Vader choking Admiral Motti.

"I find your lack of faith disturbing."

Another advantage to wearing a radiation badge other than to make you better understand the class struggle of the proletariat in realising a Trotsky's permanent revolution against the bourgeoisie, is to detect the amount of radiation passing through your body.

That is not an image of the Rod of Asclepius. It is a reminder to watch Snakes on a Plane.

Being drunk on power, I decided to put on a grim face in the hope that I might be able to turn into Rumplestiltskin or Doraemon.

But I Like It Here!

2010-02-08T19:52:00.001+11:00

The mail was short and concise.

"Hi Wan,

I need you to move office. Please come and see me tomorrow.

Thanks"

I am going to sulk all week.

Goodbye Natalie

2010-02-07T14:20:00.003+11:00

We have both said things that we should not have said. We both tried to keep this ship from sinking, but it was never meant to be.

We had some good times and have had our more than fair share of bad times. If I had the chance to wind back the clock though, I would not change anything for the world.

Bye-bye.

It's not you, it's me.

Maybe It's Time

2010-02-02T20:16:00.002+11:00

You know that it might be time to drag a razor perilously close to your throat and shave:

1.When you found a hair on the table and could never know for certain whether it fell from your head or from your beard.

2.When you need to sift through your beard after every meal to make sure nothing gets left
behind.

3. When after every shower your beard contains enough water to fill up a small dam.

4. When you are seriously considering a separate shampoo for your hair and beard.

5. When you can still taste the coffee you had 3 hours ago on your upper lip.

6. When you found out that you can now hide things in your beard e.g. pencil sharpener, loose
change, passport, fried chicken, badminton racquet, etc.

We're not paying you so you can come in anytime you want

2010-01-28T10:31:00.002+11:00

The day after Australia Day, woke up late. Drove to work slowly as the traffic on Queens Road has never been civilised in the morning.

Got to uni when it was nearly 11.00 am. Decided to get in through the rear door hoping that no one would see me sneaking in. If I took the front entrance, there would be more than likely chance that someone in the foyer would notice me.

As I pushed the door, the head of school was walking down towards the hallway with his briefcase. With sunglasses on top of my head, backpack slinged over one shoulder I have nowhere to hide anymore and gave a sheepish smile.

10 minutes lecture on the importance of being punctual and well organised.

I am never going to wake up late again.

Clucking Bell

2010-01-23T16:22:00.002+11:00

Just when you thought nothing else could go wrong, life in all its glorious technicolour kicks you in the groin with steel toe boots.

What Does He Have Against the Chinese?

2010-01-16T17:07:00.006+11:00

I caught the tram at Morrah St to get to Brunswick. The tram was packed to the brim, as per usual on a Saturday afternoon. Nary a seat available, I stood near a group of ladies and grab hold.

Halfway to my intended destination, a few people got out and an old lady got on the tram. I squeezed in, giving an impression that if I held my breath a bit more my arse would miraculously become smaller and there would be several cubic inches more free space on the tram although the several times I've done that before it works to the contrary.

I digress.

Another stop, a few more people got out and by chance there is a spare seat available left by a departing passenger. I glanced at the seat and gave way to the old lady who was still standing, trying to appear gallant and gentlemanly in the chance that any girl would give me a sliver of attention that I was desperately craving for.

Digressing again.

As I was gesturing to the lady that there is a seat available, an old man who stood near the seat said to the lady, "You better take the seat otherwise the Chinese will take it. They take everything the Chinese." And he was clearly directing his tirade at me.

I was stunned.Wearing a look of amusement, my eyes met with other passengers'.

A stop after, the old man got off. A lady said to me, "Sorry about that, I was thinking of something else to say to him but didn't want to make a scene. Don't worry, he's a dying breed."

To which I replied, "That's quite alright. I'm still alive."

I have a beard. My skin is quite tanned. My eyes are not that big, I'll accept that. But a Chinese?

Look at the smug face of that idiot, does he even look remotely Chinese?

Not that I have anything against the Chinese. Only serves to amuse me to no end.

World Weary

2010-01-14T22:34:00.001+11:00

The eyes are open, the mouth moves but Mr Brain has long since departed.

All Over Again

2010-01-07T01:04:00.007+11:00

I was listening to The Beatles when the two most feared men in the school of physics walked in the lab.

The Safety Officer and the Occupational Health & Safety Officer.

Oh snap.

It felt like the quick fire round of a very bad game show where the pit stain of the contestant under pressure is very visible.

The second question stumped me:
"Where is the written copy of the safe operating procedure?"

The operating procedure is only written on the white board.

"Where is the manual for the shut down procedure?"

I know what I'm supposed to do in case of an emergency; run as fast as I can out of the lab.

Beads of sweat on forehead.

With the next volley of questions, had to force myself not to say out loud; I never expected the Spanish Inquisition.

"I'm afraid we are going to have to shut this lab down as you do not have proper safety documentation in place. You can start your experiments again after you have done all the necessary paperwork."

My supervisor is on leave and won't be back until February.

Paper height on desk at the moment: a foot high.

Hands still shaking. Felt like being castrated with a rusty butter knife.

---------------------

Fail Lagi

2010-01-04T10:50:00.003+11:00

The propensity to screw up and do something stupid like accidentally rupturing the vacuum disc is greatly increased when your supervisor is not around and it's the first day of going back to work after the break.

Fail.

I should have just stayed home and bake cookies today.

Whinge.

When i got to uni, wanted to get some lunch. I scoured my bag to get my wallet.

I didn't bring my wallet today.

I was riding this morning without my license on me.

No wallet. No money. No license. No riding back home. Need to catch a train.

But my train ticket is in my wallet. If I want to buy a new ticket, I need money.

I can go around in circles all day.

Double fail.

25km walk back home.

I should really have just stayed home today and bake cookies.

Huh?

2010-01-02T13:12:00.003+11:00

What?!

It's already 2010?

What have I been doing for the past year?

Oh snap.

Ostensibly

2009-12-24T09:35:00.002+11:00

No wonder I saw a lot of guys using eye patches the other day.

The Chamber of Frustrations.

2009-12-20T13:50:00.003+11:00

It's Sunday. Alone in the lab. Again.

On Tuesday, a screw fell into the vacuum chamber as I was doing regular maintenance work. That thing is fast becoming the bane of my existence.

I spent the next 4 days in a staring contest with the chamber trying to figure out the best way to get the screw out without telling my supervisor or risk being banned from the lab for being such a clumsy oaf.

The chamber won the staring contest though.

My often neglected common sense tells me to not start evacuating the chamber to vacuum yet before I could get the screw out, but the inquisitive part of my pea brain tells me otherwise.

Maybe the whole thing would explode and the school reduced to cinders; I could then have the whole summer to myself.

Sigh.

Back to destroying more lab equipments.

Pressure

2009-12-11T16:16:00.002+11:00

Even after all these years, still having a hard time saying no.

Too much on my plate right now.

------------------

My little brother is getting married this month. That will be the 2nd wedding of our clan that I could not attend.

Abang derhaka.

Casablanca

2009-12-01T16:58:00.002+11:00

Excuse me while I wipe my drool everytime Ingrid Bergman walks on screen.

Damn.

My jaw dropped so many times I wouldn't be surprised if it just fell on to the ground.

"Here's looking at you, kid."

Damn.

Damn.

Movember Is Over

2009-12-01T00:57:00.006+11:00

The month long celebration of all things hirsute that is Movember has finally come to an end.

Before we all get too excited;

Movember is an annual, month-long celebration of the moustache, highlighting men’s health issues, specifically prostate cancer and depression in men. (Taken from Movember Australia)

On the night of the Movember Gala, we were supposed to head out to Birrarung Marr and dress up as the Village People. I got to be the construction worker because my mo' looks like that Hodo guy and I could never pull off the leather enthusiast look.

We could not go out that night as it was raining. Lazy ass sods.

David Hodo from Village People.

Here's my piss poor attempt at being a member of the mustachioed building industry with an ambiguous sexuality.

Next year, I'm growing a trucker mo'.

Eid Morning Drama

2009-11-27T19:09:00.002+11:00

Taken from Driving in Victoria: Rules and Responsibilities

Bicycle Lanes -

For cyclists only. Parking is allowed unless prohibited by sign. If you need to
turn left, you may drive along the bicycle lane for up to 50 metres
only if it is necessary to do so. You should be courteous to cyclists. You
must give way to cyclists in a bicycle lane and only move into a bicycle lane
when it is safe to do so.

After the eid prayers, I rushed off to send my scooter, Natalie, to the service centre. As I was riding along Peel St, I decided to turn left at Victoria St to get some cash from an ATM machine near the Victoria Market.

I rode in the bicycle lane for less than 50 metres.

As I was waiting for the light to turn green, I saw from the reflection of my side mirrors red and blue lights flashing.

Oh snap.

The Mr. Policeman stepped off from his iron horse and in his leather pants and jacket;

"Did you know that it's illegal to travel in the bicycle lane?"

"Yes. But if I want to make a turn, I'm allowed to do so if it's less than 50 metres."

"Nah mate. You're wrong."

What a great way to start the day.

The reason I need to get Natalie to a service centre is because once you switched her engine off, you need to wait for at least an hour before you'll have a fighting chance to start her back again. Considering my options, I just parked her on the sidewalk and went to the Victoria Market. Hopefully, I would be able to get her up and running again afterwards.

Still shaken from the whole affair, I decided that the best way to calm my jangled nerves is to eat.

Went and got a bucket of fried chicken spare ribs. Walked around the market. After the chicken, got a half a litre tub of excellent yoghurt. And managed to finish it in about 10 minutes.

See what you made me do Mr. Policeman? See what you made me do? *tears flowing down greasy cheeks*

After I went back to Natalie, she still won't start. I had to push her about 1km to the service centre.

I need more fried chickens.

It's A Wonderful Life

2009-11-23T01:18:00.005+11:00

"What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Mary."

"I'll take it. Then what? "

"Well, then you can swallow it, and it'll all dissolve, see... and the moonbeams would shoot out of your fingers and your toes and the ends of your hair... am I talking too much?"

It's A Wonderful Life, 1946. Starring James Stewart and Donna Reed. They don't make them like this anymore.

And I am not ashamed to admit that I cried 4 times during the course of this movie.

Such a sucker.

Cats....

2009-11-20T23:36:00.009+11:00

This cat is now suffering from severe brain damage. Someone please contact the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA). I would gladly divulge information and name names for a reasonable amount of cash.

Waking up every morning to clean the cat litter box for 9? 11? cats might not be an ideal way to start the day. But I'd rather handle cat litter than hunching over a desk trying to solve the equation for charge carrier recombination in a semiconductor. Having a blocked nose also helps.

Some of the cats at rumah Taman Sri Gombak. They are not even doing catnip, that's all I'm saying.

This however is not a cat although he has a tendency to laze around all day doing nothing and getting up whenever he hears the sound or the smell of good food.

This is also not a cat.

This is procrastination at its best. Burnt out from the week. Kena tiau because of less than impressive measurements.

Back to the Rat Race

2009-11-18T09:59:00.003+11:00

After a self proclaimed holiday for nearly two weeks; no going to uni, no hard labor, no mo' shaving, I was ready to reluctantly step back into reality and go back to work.

The ride to Monash from Parkville is approximately 25km. Takes me a good 45 minutes most days. If in a hurry, I could slash 15 minutes off. That's what I like to think though.

That's not the main point.

I use Princes Freeway almost everyday for the past 5 months. Yet after only two weeks, I have managed to get myself lost and could not find my way to the uni. Ended up at St. Kilda beach instead.

Fail.

Productivity and Work Ethics

2009-11-09T20:47:00.003+11:00

Went out to uni at 130pm. Riding in 34 degrees weather is no fun at all.

While on my bike, wanted to look at the time but I realised that I forgot to wear my watch(RM 40, Ampang Park).

Scheiße!

I decided to soldier on without my dear watch. I can't just let a small thing like this hamper my productivity for the day. Work ethics and disciplines are important when you are part of an organisation. When you are confronted with a minor setback, always view it as an opportunity and not to dwell too long on it.

By 330pm, I was already on my bike heading home.

What work?

2009-11-08T21:30:00.003+11:00

After the submission, we had a party in the honours room. Good fun.

Next dateline is not until the end of February. Summer daze ahead.

Honours kids.

It's been great knowing you guys. I'll be stuck in the office alone all summer long. Although I can use this to my advantage, like running around the office naked.

Hmmm ideas.

Congratulations on those finishing. Tough luck to those still struggling.

Sleepless Nights and Apples

2009-11-02T02:20:00.003+11:00

I don't have any exams to sit this semester but still it feels very hectic. Now have very prominent dark circles around my eyes.

The presentation went well. Standing in front of such a distinguished audience, big shots of the physics world, tends to make you shake in your boots. But after the initial butterflies, I managed not to screw up big time or embarrass my supervisor.

Next: literature review.

Submitted my first draft, it came back full of red ink marks.

I spent 3 sleepless nights trying to finish that and now I need to change everything and write a new one.

------------

My sister went digging for apples and she managed to find old pictures from our childhood.

That was me being held by my father when I was don't know how old.

A friend asked me, "Why you look cute when small but grow up not so cute? Your dad also very fair but why are you not so fair?"

Haiya. $64 000 question.

-------

Oh yes, it's Movember again people. Start growing your mo' for a good cause.

Is She Really Going Out With Him?

2009-10-28T20:50:00.003+11:00

Pretty women out walking with gorillas down my street.

Is She Really Going Out With Him - Joe Jackson

Heh heh.

Work

2009-10-25T00:43:00.001+11:00

Back to work. Forget Big Brother, he's a wimp. Darth Vader is watching.

Kaki Ponteng

2009-10-15T10:20:00.003+11:00

It's not that I don't want to go to uni.

I do.

It's not that I don't want to be stuck in the lab setting up all the equipments with no one for company except for a decrepit transistor radio tuned to a talkback AM radio station.

I don't mind.

Not being able to leave the lab during the sputtering process as part of the safety requirement; which goes on for about 1 hour and 15 minutes. Even more if something goes wrong.

Seriously, I don't mind.

But it was raining outside. And its 7 degrees.

No, wait. 4 degrees.

I don't want to arrive at uni in a shivering mess. My socks would get wet, and when my socks are wet I get grumpy.

You won't like me when I'm grumpy.

I'll still wear a smile on my face. But then, hypothetically speaking, someone makes fun of my helmet hair; I'll be off like Thomas the Tank Engine powered by a nuclear reactor.

Before I forget, Natalie would get wet in the rain.

Here she is getting wet out the back. And it makes me sad.

For those of you mocking at my inability to move on, here's more ammo for you. She looks a bit like Winona.

Pathetic.

Sorry

2009-10-09T19:11:00.003+11:00

I apologise.

When I'm hungry and still stuck in the office, to alleviate (or exacerbate?) the hunger pangs I would surf the web looking at pictures of food. Glorious food.

Again, I apologise. I seriously need help.

Look away now if you're on a diet.

[Flickr:ccaviness]

Krispy Kreme Cheddar Cheeseburger

I need to change my shirt. Too many saliva stains.

Kelam Kabut

2009-10-08T22:27:00.005+11:00

Just found out that I am due to give an honours halfway talk in 3 weeks time. Why wasn't I informed of this earlier? Argh!!

Okay, let's be civil. Don't panic, before we start throwing chairs and pulling our hairs out why don't we all take a deep breath and calm down..

*inhale....

*exhale...

"Wan, I don't know how many academics will be attending your talk. They don't usually ask questions for the halfway talk but that rule seems to have been broken last year. Be well prepared."

ARGH!!

*kicking and screaming*

*shredding scientific journals*

*kicking a sleeping dog*

*urinating in public places*

After that seemingly act of wanton destruction, I am the picture of serenity now.

*birds chirping in the sky, a rainbow on the horizon, the smell of freshly cut grass*

From now on, I promise that there will be no more procrastination. Full steam ahead. Even if the house burns down, I will not budge.

Except when I'm hungry. Or The Simpsons is on the TV. Or a rugby game is on. Or the toilet paper runs out. Or when I need a new pair of socks. Or when I want a nice cup of latte with 2 sugars. Or when the weather is too cold.

Other than that, I would never leave my workspace.

Never.

Betul tu.

2009-10-05T21:01:00.003+11:00

I did went back to KL for a week, it was not officially a break. Doing research is not as romantic as it sounds.

"A town is a thing like a colonial animal....How news travels through a town is a mystery not easily to be solved. News seems to move faster than small boys can scramble and dart to tell it, faster than women can call it over the fence."

Excerpt taken from The Pearl by John Steinbeck

By the way all the rumours that you heard about me, as to why I went back to KL is true. All true. Not denying any of it one bit.

Benda baik buat apa nak rahsia-rahsia.

*blushing

By the way, before it's too late.

Darth Vader mengucapkan selamat hari raya. Join the dark side, we have nasik himpit now.

More Whining

2009-09-23T18:02:00.002+10:00

Would you like to hear me whine some more?

I'm hearing a lot of 'yes-pleases' so I won't disappoint, such a nice guy that I am.

"Maybe next week we can start the sputtering process."

"Um, next week is the mid semester break."

"Actually, it's a non teaching period. It means there is no lecture for undergrad students. You are not an undergrad, which means that you still need to come to uni."

Mind if I go around the corner and cry? And maybe gorge several chocolate bars?

(-_-!)

"Good. Well done. Here's more. Try and finish this."

2009-09-16T22:59:00.003+10:00

Glimpse of an experimental physicist troubled thoughts:

Don't ever tell your supervisor you've done all the task assigned. He will be impressed and proceed to give you more work.

Much more work.

Sigh.

______

Dislocated shoulder saga continued:

Options given by the concerted effort of physiotherapist and orthopaedic surgeon -

1: Continue playing rugby as usual. Strap shoulder to make it as tight as possible. Risk of future dislocation.

2: Shoulder reconstruction. No rugby for at least a year.

3: Quit playing. Sit on your ass all day long and play solitaire.

dumbstruck

2009-09-10T19:39:00.003+10:00

It was after hours, about 730pm. Still in the building. Heading outside to get some fresh air.

Met the head of the school of physics in the corridor.

Must remember next time not to froze in your tracks and say something polite.

"Hi Micheal."

"How are you today? A bit chilly outside eh? I heard the commonwealth will be raising interest rates soon."

"How are you sleeping? Good?"

"I heard a funny story today about the difference between peanut butter and jam, do you have a minute to hear it?"

I could have said those things but instead, I stood affixed to my spot with mouth agape. My facility for polite pleasantries seems to decide that at that precise moment it is going to go visit Penang and no force in the world could ever stop it. Not even the head of the school.

I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to everyone for my minor indiscretion. I have truly let you all down. This won't happen again, I promise. Next time, I would hide behind something large enough whenever I see him coming. Like the broom cupboard. Or the server room. Or the photocopier room.

Geeks Unite!

2009-09-06T22:19:00.006+10:00

Last week, went to Star Wars: Where Science Meets Imagination at Scienceworks, Spotswood.

Spent nearly 3 hours there.

Release your inner geek.

I have dreamt of this moment since I was a little kid, to one day have the chance to meet with Darth Vader.

Now, I can die a happy man.

Father?

Had the opportunity to ask Yoda for his wisdom on whether I should put my left socks first before my right or not change my preference, which is right before left.

"When 900 years old you reach, look as good you will not, hmm?"

Oh yes, I got a Darth Vader mask now. I am going to look so cool walking around KLCC with the mask on. Chicks dig guys with Darth Vader masks.

kthx, bai.

Kalah

2009-08-31T17:20:00.002+10:00

It was the last game of the season and we lost to Monash Uni.

Oh the humanity.

Plain water never looked so good.

Back Story

2009-08-23T14:21:00.007+10:00

Disclaimer: The author wishes to advise that this post contains graphic material and is not suitable to be read before breaking fast. Parental supervision is strongly advised.

The following events took place on Friday the 21st of August 2009

Just got back from Clayton. Fira told me that there would be an indoor soccer game and asked me to come along.

I didn't have time to get back to Albion St so I just went to a friend's place and grabbed the first pair of track pants that I could eye from his cupboard.

Took a 10 minutes tram ride to the indoor soccer ground. Just when I was about ready to enter the playing field, I noticed that there was a huge rip in my pants.

How I could not realise that I was wearing a ripped pants in the first place, I don't know. The owner of the pants in question has been subjected to 2 minutes of waterboarding for keeping a ripped pants in his cupboard.

In hindsight, it was an awfully windy day so I did not notice any unusual breeze. The tram was a bit packed, so I stood near the door. No wonder that old lady with the walking frame was smiling flirtatiously at me.

This is how I would usually look like with a normal pants

FOR THE WEAK OF HEART, AVERT YOUR GAZE NOW!

Trying to open the image above in a larger resolution is not recommended.

Lucky I was wearing underpants. If not, this might be a matter of national security.

When you've already walked around half of Brunswick with your bum showing for the world to see, slicing your throat with a rusty butter knife does not sound as bad.

Eulogy

2009-08-22T00:37:00.004+10:00

The times we had together was great. Thank you.

But I guess this is goodbye. We had to went our separate ways.

It seems that you have managed to find someone new in your life while I am still stuck living in the past.

Story of my life.

I used to hold your hand. Comfort you when you're down. We went through life hand in hand, through ups and downs. When I'm with you, the world seems to stop spinning, time and space revolving around us and no one else.

I can still remember the day when I met you. That tingle; oh how my heart stopped, melted, broken into a thousand pieces and mended again all at the same time.

I will never forget that moment, that cherished moment when you came around and changed my life forever.

But now the times have changed. I need to move on. You found someone new.

That someone new will now hold your hand. Comfort you when you're feeling down. Going through life together. The world will stop spinning for someone else.

How it breaks my heart to think about you and your someone new. I hope that he will treat you with the same kind of respect and care that I have shown you over the years.

I shall miss you dearly.

May your life ahead be filled with joy and wonderment.

Bye bye Winona.

Damn it I hate goodbyes.

"I can do this."

2009-08-17T17:47:00.003+10:00

"Nino, the wiring is in place, the circuit looks good. I think I've got everything down pat."

"Hah. Everything down pat, famous last words."

Sure enough. Everything is not down pat. I have to redo the whole thing for the umpteenth time.

What the hell is my thesis topic again?
Can I please change it to "On the grinding of sky high confidence level into the dirt and wallowing in self pity"?

*curse*

Mad. Mongo is mad.

Rugby please?

Please?

Pretty please?

Okay. Fine.

Doing Just Fine

2009-08-15T02:14:00.003+10:00

"You're doing great work. Well done. The time for grief will come later. As all honours student do."

-Supervisor to student-

Rant [verb] - to talk in a wild and vehement manner

2009-08-09T15:38:00.006+10:00

Commuting everyday to Clayton from Brunswick is hard work. The situation is not made any better by Connex, the public train operator.

And it worsens into a shithouse type of situation as you hope that any day soon that they will finally bank in your allowance that is due for nearly 3 months now.

Congratulations on another job well done.

Because I could no longer afford to buy a ticket to get to and fro, I have resolved to hole up in my office and only get back home on weekends until my allowance is banked in.

I have expected that this would happen so I've made savings for rainy days like these. But when it rains for nearly 3 months, you can only eat dust and live on hope waiting for the sun to come out again. Butter spread so thin, there is no butter anymore.

Hoping for better days.

"Patience my young padawan"

-Master Yoda-

Disclaimer: some part of this entry is true while some might be wildly exaggerated. Use your imagination.

Selamat Pengantin Baru

2009-08-04T20:22:00.003+10:00

"One down. Six more to go."

Let's see. If my calculations are correct. Only 3 are still single.

Fret not. Save the best for last.

Heh heh.

Wan Zalina just got married. Game over.
Wan Zuriah: won't be too long. Off the market.
Wan Zailin: Getting engaged sometime this year.
Wan Mohd Zahidi: Not Applicable.¹
Wan Muhd Zahier: Already engaged. Getting married at the end of the year.
Wan Zahrah: Finishing school this year.
Wan Muhd Zahran: Still in standard 3. Negligible.

Footnote:

Not applicable also means as single as a Pringle.

Adik Derhaka

2009-07-31T22:17:00.004+10:00

I got caught up in all the hype and excitement of starting honours year I seems to have forgotten one thing.

Tomorrow is the 1st of August 2009.

My eldest sister is getting married.

Adik derhaka....

I have tried everything I could on my end to wriggle my way back to Malaysia to attend her big day.

Adik derhaka....

I apologise that I could not attend your big day. May your next phase in life be wonderful accompanied by your significant other.

Semoga berkekalan ke anak cucu.

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

2009-07-28T20:32:00.005+10:00

So goodbye yellow brick road

Where the dogs of society howl

You can't plant me in your penthouse

I'm going back to my plough

Elton John - Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

I could not help but to feel all melancholic and sentimental. Excuse me.

It's been a good 3 years and a half at University of Melbourne. It hasn't always been sunshine, lollipops and rainbows but the good moments tends to outweighs the bad. It's not always easy cruising. At times, it seems as if your classmates are all geniuses and savants while you're the least common denominator.

Seems like it was yesterday that I arrived in Melbourne; snotty nosed, wide eyed, and eager to learn and live. Time flies when you're having fun it seems.

Anyway, goodbye University of Melbourne. It's been fun.

Hello Monash University.

My new uni is a bit way out of town, took me an hour to get there on a good day. Desperately need to buy a scooter or some form of motorised vehicle.

Sydney Part 2

2009-07-17T21:49:00.002+10:00

I went to Sydney to kill two birds with one stone. For the National Conference Games and for my interview.

The former was cut short by my injury and the latter somehow went horribly wrong. I went in the interview with an air of nonchalance and laissez faire attitude. Sports jacket, white t-shirt, and jeans is a no no.

Not that I don't know.

Meh.

The view from our apartment at night

Sydney Part 1

2009-07-16T07:35:00.003+10:00

Sydney is: messy, convoluted, noisy, crowded, noisome, expensive, terrible and I happen to like it.

I'll take Melbourne anytime though, hands down.

Woke up with this view from my bedside every morning.

Had a good time overall although it was marred by what seemed to me as a terrible attempt of the host trying to organise an event which they severely underestimated and in turn fail; crash and burn.

Haven't stepped foot in Tasmania, Northern Territory and Western Australia. Yet. Time and of course, money, will change that.

Hiatus = Bored

2009-07-04T10:20:00.002+10:00

On a self imposed hiatus from all form of sports.

Bored to death.

Finally received my offer from Monash. The race for supervisors' signature and projects is now on.
Decision on whether to go to La Trobe or Monash needs to be made asap.

Pining for a particle physics project although it might be a bit more than I can chew with all the high level theory and maths.

On another note, I no longer need to wear a sling.
Yeay!
Although the shoulder still feels a bit 'loose'. My arm might fall off when lifting heavy objects. Another reason to sit on my ass.

The Man Who Had One Arm and Does Not Know What To Do With It

2009-06-29T18:05:00.005+10:00

Sorry.

Maaf.

On Saturday I had to play for two teams. First match at 12.00 noon and another at 3.00pm.

Never thought it would turn out this way.

A massive guy, maybe about 130kgs -the ground literally shook when he ran, came in to my left. I was a bit distracted and had no time to lower my shoulder and wrap him around the legs proper. I decided to tackle chest high.

Big mistake.

I heard something popped out. Left shoulder.

I took a knee. About 5 seconds later, it popped back in.

I came off the field a minute later. Not willing to risk it.

Oh and the 130kg guy, he just went straight past me like I was not even there. He must thought I was waving for the bus when I stretched my arm.

Can barely lift my arm when I got home.

Ah painkillers, where would I be without you.

When I told my dad about what happened, he was not too pleased. Copped an earful.

Bila dah lama tak kena marah, there's nothing you can do except to just suck it in and try not to cry. Heh heh. (Another bad habit: making light of a serious situation. I'll stop tomorrow.)

Don't worry, I'm okay now. Nothing major, just a torn rotator cuff. Nothing major. Not too bad.

Now in a sling and discovering new things. What you can and can't do with just one arm i.e. riding a bike is highly not recommended.

Khadam! Basuh pinggan dan masak. Aku lapar.

I'm too sexy for my shirt. Too sexy for my shirt. Too sexy it hurts.

Kedegilan Membawa Padah

2009-06-25T21:23:00.002+10:00

"Dengar cakap orang tua. Jangan degil."

That's what my mother told me a trillion times when I was a kid.

After my last injury -about 6 weeks ago, my dad told me to give sports a rest and take a break for 3 months.

Okay. Okay.

Ya. Ya.

Tak main lagi dah.

Ya.

After I've finished my last paper today, I decided to get back to training again.

I should have listened.

If my nose were any bit more mancung, it would be broken already.

Lucky, it was only swollen. My eyes welled up when I got out of the high tackle.

Dah rupa macam Shrek.

Nostalgia Pen Biru RM2.90

2009-06-25T15:05:00.006+10:00

Allow me to get all nostalgic and sappy.

Me and that pen goes a long way back.

We have been busting our ass at Melbourne Uni for 3 years and a half. (why the half? heh heh)

As I was answering my last paper as an undergraduate -Statistical Physics 640384, the ink ran out.

A rationale thing to do would be to curse and throw the pen at the invigilator.

But because we have such a history together, I couldn't help but give a little smirk shed a tear for a trusty compadre.

I bought him in Malaysia, as a bright eyed (re: sepet) kid preparing for his journey to the land of down under. At Carrefour Wangsa Maju.

I bid you adieu, you've been a good friend.

Oh by the way, if you have to know, I always have a spare pen with me. I'm a 'What If?' guy.

Mandi Bunga

2009-06-18T04:05:00.002+10:00

Before you get all holier-than-thou with me, I know.

There's a reason. Hear me out.

When I got out of the shower this morning, I tripped and sprained my ankle. Again.

The metal plate felt more loose than usual because of the fall. Went to a GP, got myself more painkillers.(woohoo!) The only silver lining perhaps. As for the metal plate, let's just say I can play it like a glockenspiel now.

There's more. This pathetic story does not end yet.

I was asked by a friend to send him to the airport, he's getting married.

Just as we were about ready, I noticed that I have lost my wallet.

There's no money in there, student mana ada duit. Only my IC, Uni ID, driving license, ATM card and most importantly, gambar awek(spot the bluff).

After I've sent my friend to the airport (driving without a license; law abiding citizen I am.), hopped on my bike and tried to retrace my steps.

Melbourne's winter at 3am; 4° Celcius, foggy (Jack the Ripper is going to love this), 10m visibility, and wet.

Riding a bike in this kind of weather should be made illegal.

Trying to find a lost wallet only leaves you wet and grumpy. Things can get ugly very fast. Or uglier.

It never rains.

Kena mandi bunga bawah jambatan ni.

The Monkey On My Back With A Nametag

2009-06-13T19:49:00.005+10:00

I find women wearing baggy jeans to be attractive.

And if she happens to pull on a rugby jersey (preferably the Wallabies green and gold) as her choice of clothing to go about town, I swear I would grab her (by the hands you hamsap!) and look for the nearest tok kadi.

There. I said it.

Satisfied now?

Now monkey, please get off my back.

Tanam pinang rapat-rapat,

Agar puyuh tak dapat lari,

Ku pinang-pinang tak dapat-dapat,

Ku rayu-rayu ku bawak berlari.

Fo' Shiznit

2009-06-09T01:13:00.002+10:00

For weeks, I thought that my first exam is on Thursday the 11th. But a friend posted a status update on FB, it was actually on Wednesday.

SHIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!

So Long My Love, Goodbye.

2009-06-05T22:29:00.007+10:00

When you're at the end, you tend to remember how it all began.

We met at Smith St. Through the window pane of the Quiksilver store, I saw her and was immediately captivated.

"Would you believe in a love at first sight?"
"Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time."

With A Little Help From My Friends - The Beatles

We had a great relationship. Got off on the wrong foot at first, but as time goes on we grew on each other and we could not be separated. We went through it all together, thick and thin, not one moment apart. We travelled together, went to all four corners of Australia and even hopped on a plane to see the fabled land of New Zealand.

I remembered the first time I went back home for her to meet my parents. My parents didn't seem to notice her though, just a passing remark. It hurts. But it did not matter as our love grew stronger each passing day. We don't need anyone else, we have each other.

Nasi lemak buah bidara,
Sayang selasih hamba lurutkan,
Buang emak buang saudara,
Kerana kasih hamba turutkan.

All good things must come to an end.

Her situation got worse this year. Especially when it rains. She would get soaked to the bone. It would take days for her to recover and be her normal self. We knew we were only delaying the inevitable. I knew I had to do the right thing.

It's not fair when life throws you a curveball like this. I hate saying goodbyes, even more so to the ones I love. Especially to her. Not her. Please, not her. It's all just a matter of time. But I wouldn't want her to suffer anymore.

I have to admit. It was hard and painful to let go. But you have to move on. Life goes on.

Goodbye leggy blonde. It's been nice knowing you. The gaping hole on your sole is making my socks wet whenever it rains. If it comforts you, I would like you to know that it is not an easy decision for me to make. I would always remember you. (cue Whitney Houston - I Will Always Love You)

When you're at the end, you tend to remember how it all began.

A Curious Boy and an Enchanted Blade

2009-05-28T22:16:00.009+10:00

When I was little - yes I was little once, I watched with amazement whenever my dad shaves. He had this steel razor that he places on the dresser. That razor is a thing of not just majestic beauty but also of expedient practicality. A Gilette Mach 3 couldn't hold a candle to this bad boy.

My dad with a knife. Pablo Escobar wouldn't want to mess with him when he's holding a knife.

Like any kid with a favourite pastime activity of reading, reading and more reading , I secretly covet that razor. I wanted to wield its grazing power in my hand and glide the razor all over my face.

One day after school, my dad is not home from work yet and my mom is probably at the kitchen cooking for 6 ungrateful offspawns (Mamat was not in the picture yet at the time), I went into my parents room and climbed on a chair to reach the dresser. On top of the dresser is the prized razor, gleaming in the afternoon sunlight.

That is me around the time of the purported incident. Standard 2?3?

Holding it in my hand, I can feel its mythical powers. King Arthur must have felt the same thing when the Lady of the Lake handed to him the mighty Excalibur. I felt a great responsibilty now burdened on my shoulders yet at the same time, a feeling of elation swept over me - like a swallow floating on an updraft.

I then flicked the razor over my left sideburn and noticed a tuft of hair on the razor. COOL! The excitement and ecstasy at that time is indescribable. I have managed to exert my will onto the razor and shave something, a childhood dream coming true. Feeling cheeky and rather proud of myself, like a chimp figuring out it can either throw a rock or poo at humans staring into the enclosement at the zoo for maximum gratification, I got rid of the evidence and ran away from the scene of the crime.

When you're a kid, your concept of symmetry is still not fully developed yet. So for me at the time, a lopsided sideburns is nothing major. No one will ever notice it if I don't.

Making mistakes is a good way to learn. And learn I did. My mom noticed the freshly grazed sideburns and told my dad when he came home. I can't remember what I got, must be at least a tarik telinga. We went to Kedai Pak Lah Gunting Rambut to get it repaired, meeting a few of his friends a long the way and he cannot resist showing them what I did. Using the chimp analogy again, I grinned mischievously.

Now, every time when I woke up in the morning, lather my face with shaving foam, glide my razor mere millimetres away from vital carotid arteries around my neck I often gave out a chuckle. Because now, I look like this.

If you look close enough under all that growth, you might be lucky enough to spot the Lost Tribe of the Amazon.

Irony tastes like something with iron in it.

This Is Why You're Fat

2009-05-24T16:14:00.003+10:00

Whenever I'm feeling particularly peckish, I often go to this website.

This is why you're fat

A couple of reasons why.

A deep fried cheese-stuffed portobello mushroom between two cheeseburgers.

Sloppy joe on a Krispy Kreme

Now tell me with a straight face that your mouth did not water at the sight of that and that you can stave off temptation to stuff your self silly with glorious, preferably deep fried and oily, food.

At first you might be feeling a bit turned off, "How could somebody eat something like that?". But then, you will start to cast off all inhibitions and have to fight the urge to lick at the monitor.

This is food porn at its best.

Now if you will excuse me. I need to find a towel or maybe a mop to wipe my dripping saliva.

Lost Keys: A Heartfelt Plea For A New Jacket

2009-05-22T23:20:00.003+10:00

Been awake for more than 48+ hours. A nerve-wracking presentation on Wednesday. An horrendous stat physics assignment on Friday.

We tried to mount a united assault on the assignment Thursday night until we all could take no more.

Had a senile moment, could not remember where my bike was parked. Took me about half an hour to look for it in every possible parking spot. It was parked at the Union House. Have no recollection how it managed to be there in the first place. Most probably the combination of very little sleep and lack of brainpower, sapped dry by the villainous assignment.

Bitterly cold on the ride home. But when I reached home, could not find my keys anywhere. I patted myself up and down, here and there. Digression: If the Divinyls - I Touch Myself was playing at the moment, my actions can be described as something teetering on the borders of lewd behaviour. End Digression.

Then I noticed that there is a large hole in my jacket pocket. Lucky, I was seriously considering performing a full body cavity search...

Hopped on my bike again and cycled again all the way back to uni, retracing my steps. Found it lying in the middle of Royal Parade, literally.

Lack of a decent meal for almost 3 days, not enough sleep, bloodshot eyes, fatigue. Combine all that and the chances of me finding that jumble of keys is probably as ridiculous as the Perak political stand off. But find it I did.

Finally able to enter the house, didn't even bother to change. Sleeping in your jeans will leave you with suspicious markings all over your body.

The main point of this long-winded and at times incoherent post: my jacket has a large hole in it. Anybody care to get me a new one. Size M. Any colour except pink.

If you can read all this without feeling any sense of guilt or pity, you are a cold hearted Mr. Scrooge. New jacket please.

Yes, I am that desperate.

Sepet

2009-05-21T10:16:00.006+10:00

When a Chinese girl says this to you;
"You also sepet what."

Then you know for sure that you are sepet as well. Took me 23 years to realise the fact. All my life I have been teasing friends with slit eyes.

Worst joke: "Your eyes are so small you can probably see interference pattern." (Another example of a terrible attempt at physics humour.)

Humble pie.

Ada cermin tak nak tengok. Meh.